Fate, Fortune and Friendship
by MarshAngel
Summary: Alternate Reality exploration of Mamory and Setsuna's deep frienship as he finds love with Serena
1. Default Chapter

Fate, Fortune, and Friendship MarshAngel- Chapter1 watsonma@hotmail.com http://angelmoon.sinfree.net  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That would be a waste of energy.  
  
1/24/03 - I made a few corrections nothing major. I simply reread this chapter and decided that I didn't like the way it read so i fixed it. I may decide to do the same with later chapters but that's it for now.  
  
  
  
I stared out the window of my penthouse apartment, watching as the sun rose brilliantly over the surrounding high-rise buildings. It was almost too bright to look at but my eyes were focused on nothing and never cleared for a moment to appreciate the brilliant display of nature before me. I was occupied with thoughts of an entirely different nature. Hindsight is twenty-twenty and looking back now, last night had been a mistake, an enormous one. Last night I crossed a line that shouldn't have even been toed. Today would have me replaying the event and undoubtedly paying the price for my error. I thought, for a moment, to blame it on the alcohol we'd both consumed but that was insulting to both our prides, intelligence, and constitution. If nothing else, we were more than capable of holding our liquor. The liquor had helped of course. It had clouded our thoughts and created a murky, chaotic disarray of our emotions. There has always been something about Flor de Cana rum that attracted us both, and after downing the greater part of a bottle we'd easily consented to solving the issue of our unremitting, but suddenly overwhelming, loneliness in each other. It had been, quite simply, a bad idea, one born of desperation, impatience and long forgotten desire. Now, when the dark secret pleasures of the night had passed, we had the day to face and harsh daylight was rarely ever forgiving. I turned my back on the fast arriving daylight and leaned against the thick, wide, glass window without concern to the hard asphalt more than twenty-five stories below. She would have glared at me had she been awake to see me do this, instead of lying nestled comfortably between my sheets. I often did it just to annoy her since she seemed determined to pass her fear of heights on to me. She would never admit to her fear however. She wouldn't admit to a weakness of any kind. I glanced over at her sleeping form. Her presence here like this disrupted my normal indifference to the things that made this room the luxurious but impersonal place that it was. I looked around my bedroom as if seeing it for the first time. The room, much like the rest of my apartment, was a monument to the success I had gained, an empty trophy with no life within its walls. From the lush carpet, to the twilight-blue walls, and the enormous black lacquered Italian wood bed covered in fine black Egyptian cotton sheets, everything reeked of expense. It wasn't all that different from her own apartment, only a few city blocks away. We'd had the same real estate agent. Her own rooms were decorated with pale green walls and large plants that gave it an almost tropical feel; the set up was much the same and so were our tastes. She always reminded me of some kind of exotic, mysterious, princess. She seemed perfectly set in the environment of her own place, with it's exotic flavor, but I suspected she preferred the familiarity of mine, since she spent so much time here. I think my doorman believes she lives here. No matter where we were though, at times I was almost certain wherever she was, was home. Her presence in my apartment, in my bed, wasn't unusual but today she seemed alien to me. Undoubtedly that was because all those other times she had been dressed and mostly awake, lounging comfortable in her second home. She was my partner, my best friend, at times almost like a sister. She certainly tried to boss me around enough, telling me what to wear and what to eat as well as a variety of other interferences. She specified exactly what to get her for her birthday, for Christmas; she wouldn't want me making a terrible mistake by trying to choose something on my own. The sight of her wrapped up in my sheets, her long hair, a thick mess, tangled over her bare arms, was an entirely different image, one I hadn't even dared to fantasize about for longer than I could remember, although more than half the men I knew certainly had. Staring at her in my bed, for a moment I wondered why I'd never considered a relationship with her. I'd always known the answer to that though. It hadn't been for lack of attraction; there had been that once, a long time ago. That had been something we'd learned to ignore once we'd gotten to know each other and recognized our personality conflicts. We were far too much alike. We were similar in so many ways especially in personality and character. It was fortunate we agreed on many things because compromising wasn't a part of either of our personalities. It was what allowed us to be great business partners. One of the secretaries in the office had once referred to her as a cold bitch. It was an insult that was almost faultless. Setsu was as demanding as she was unemotional. I was almost certain that I was the only one to have seen her exhibit any type of vivid emotion; emotions so similar to my own, with their dark passionate undercurrents barely noticeable. There have been times where I was almost sure I'd felt them myself. We shared intimate emotions with no one else but each other and most often without words, offering only the comfort of our silent presence. Last night had been one of those rare moments when we'd both let down the walls we'd built - as much to block out the rest of the world, as to protect our own feelings - and allowed ourselves to delve into the overwhelming emotions we had held back for so long. We were both angry at the world. It was anger as much built on fear as it was an integral part of our personas. It was anger that had, in our younger years seemed so overwhelming it had threatened to consume us. It was the same anger that fueled our success and made us fiercely determined to conquer the past. We were both determined to conquer with our wills, the world, and whatever unjust fate, had started us off in life with such dark beginnings. It had been so long since either of us had truly thought about our dark past. It wasn't something that came up in our everyday lives of luxury, a result of the success we'd both achieved. Something about last night had us both thinking of the past however. Of course it could have been just another of Setsuna's binges, one I'd gladly joined, not for a moment recognizing it for what it might have been. Ever since we were young, struggling together to make it against every obstacle in our path, we'd recognized a self-destructive dark side in each other. Now we were in business together and in many ways things hadn't changed, except we never mentioned the struggles we had faced so many years ago. I knew she thought about it though. She didn't want to, but she did, and ever so often it sent her a bit over the edge. Every once in a while Setsuna would shut herself off from the world and drown herself in excessive amounts of liquor. It was a strange habit that had begun when she'd been only sixteen. Of course she had graduated from the cheap harsh liquor she had been able to afford then, to the South American Flor De Cana, flavorful Jamaican Appleton rums and Macallan scotch. She wasn't by any means an alcoholic; it was just her way. She always called and I'd always come just in time to pick up her limp body from the floor of whatever hotel room she happened to be lying in, take her back to my apartment and put her to bed, lying beside her until she woke up in some semblance of sobriety for another few months. Last night hadn't been the result of one of her binges, however; not entirely anyway. I suspect now, looking back, that it could have been the start of one; one I had interrupted. There had been a party, one I had insisted we attend, despite her wishes to stay at home. The New Years Party was obviously the catharsis for last night's events. I should have been more sensitive to her mood, but determining Setsu's emotion's had always been somewhat difficult. She had been a bit more stoic and colder than usual. Her dark green eyes had held a glint of impatience only I could recognize, but somehow managed to ignore. I had, for a change, been the one doing the convincing. I'd wanted to attempt some casual business during the party and having her there was important. She was, after all, the second half of a successful partnership. Ami Mizuno, a brilliant engineer of some minor renown and her partner had also been invited. I desperately needed to get my hands on technology they owned. I needed Setsuna, who had proven repeatedly that she could be very diplomatic when inspired. She hadn't had the opportunity to show of her diplomacy skills last night however, since our quarry hadn't made an appearance at the party. Feeling slightly guilty, at the waste of time and energy, I'd given in and we'd returned to my apartment. I'd also finally caught on to Setsu's mood and damned if I wasn't sharing in it too. We'd been mostly drunk by the time the count down was over. I hadn't thought too much of it while it was happening, but now looking back, I realized that a drinking binge on New Year's Eve wasn't exactly normal for either of us. Setsu didn't drink much in company, not even mine. "Another year of being alone and miserable, with nothing but dark memories," She'd whispered as we sat side by side on the couch watching an array of sappy pop stars ring in the new year on the television. It was then that I recognized the feeling for what it was, the feeling that had resulted in our present situation. It was a familiar feeling I recognized in myself, loneliness. All we'd ever really had was each other and while that had once been enough it was not nearly enough anymore. Now there was her biological clock and both our lack of companionship that was always an undercurrent of our complex relationship. "It's not as bad as all that," Setsu. I had mumbled, tossing my head back in a relaxed fashion. "Of course it is." It was amazing how cultured and calm she could sound after consuming all that liquor. Her voice took on a bitter note. "You know you'd think that after my father sold me for a whore life could only go up from there." "It did, or didn't you notice? Killing the bastard wasn't exactly fun for me. I can assure you this is much better." Everyday I was amazed I'd actually gotten away with it. I suppose the police hadn't done a thorough investigation on the drunken man they'd found lying dead in a gutter. No one was missing him anyway. Atsuhiko Meiou had been a bastard of the first order. He'd sold his fifteen- year-old daughter to pay off some gambling debts. I could still remember bashing him over the back of the head with a half filled bottle of cheap rum I'd shared with Setsuna after I'd helped her escape from the bastard who'd bought her. It was an event that had bonded us for life. "The money's great but this isn't exactly paradise," She'd stated simply. "It isn't?" "I know you can't help yourself but do try not to be so obnoxious." She'd said. "Ok." I hadn't been feeling particularly verbose at the time, a result of seemingly equal parts of liquor and blood in my body. The turn of the conversation was as unusual as it was depressing. "I am twenty-eight years old," she'd continued, "I have had a miserable life and I have never been in a serious relationship. I have never been able to open up to anyone besides you and right now the thought of facing another year alone isn't particularly appealing to me especially since right this very moment being alone is the last thing I want." "You're not alone," I'd said throwing an arm around her shoulder, as we both slumped together on the couch. "You know what I mean." "Yeah, I do." And I did. I knew it all too well. I'd certainly solved both our problems, I thought bitterly to myself, trying to decide if I'd taken advantage of her vulnerability or she of mine. She'd voiced feelings I'd always felt but never admitted. Still, despite last night, we'd still be alone. We couldn't survive a relationship together, at least not the kind of relationship we both wanted. I turned back to face the sunlight streaming through the windows. I pulled the blinds closed. I walked back over to the bed and sat down beside Setsuna looking down at her peaceful face. She stirred and I watched amusedly as her brows wrinkled and her eyes opened. She stuck her tongue out and swatted at her face like a kitten. There was hair in her mouth. She looked up at me even as I looked down at her, and groaned. "Hung over?" I questioned softly "Not really. I was just hoping I was dreaming." "Unfortunately, no." She rolled over; taking the sheets she had wrapped herself in with her. She stood up on the other side of the bed looking at him sitting comfortably on the other side of the bed. "Well you're taking this awfully well," she commented. "I've had some time to think about it," I replied. "And?" "And nothing. I woke up early without the luxury of a hangover to cloud my mind and I have thought about this and I'm no further in my thought processes than I was when I first started. I am calm however" "Then we're on the same level." She ran a finger through her thick, long, black hair. "What now?" "I don't know." I replied. "Does this change anything between us?" She asked calmly. "Do you want it to?" "Not particularly. I'm actually hoping we could forget any of this ever happened." "Is that even possible?" I asked even as I hoped for the same. "I don't know but I aim to try," she replied. "I couldn't possibly have been that bad!" I teased. "That was definitely not the problem and you know it. You were always more than confident in all your abilities." "There could be consequences," I said out loud even as I realized it. "I hadn't thought of it, but I suppose it's possible." I raised an eyebrow. Even for her, that was a remarkably calm reception to the idea of being pregnant with my child. "Well?" I questioned, wishing seriously to know what she'd think. I was running over a dozen possibilities in my mind but none of them made any sense. I reminded myself that it was an unlikely possibility so there was no need to worry. "It's very unlikely, but I have to say that I don't think I'd mind so much." She had the strangest reflective look on her face. I was shocked to say the least. I had never for a moment pictured Setsuna as a mother and certainly not the mother of my child. She had never been my image of a mother. I couldn't really imagine her changing diapers or nursing. It seemed so alien to her personality. "Don't look so shocked, she said. I'm beginning to think I might never have a normal long-term relationship with a guy. If I happen to be pregnant I'll get the one benefit of a relationship most guys wouldn't even agree to, without the tortures of having to date any of them." "I guess I never thought of you as a mother" I said, instantly regretting it. It wasn't exactly something you said to a woman. She didn't seem to be too insulted however. Logic rather than emotion ruled her life. I wondered if she saw herself as a mother when she looked into the mirror of the future. Maybe our visions were clouded by assumptions we'd made of each other and ourselves, assumptions that may have once been true but had ceased to be so as time passed. "I didn't use to either. I guess the older you get the more you think about these things. You know a lot of women are choosing to be single parents and have kids without the complications of a relationship. I wouldn't be that unusual. Besides I think I lucked out with a better set of genes than I could have at any sperm bank." She added trying to make light of a situation that was much too serious. "Setsu, if you had this baby, assuming there is a baby, you wouldn't exactly be a single parent. I would be the father of our child. What about our relationship then?" "I don't know," she replied. She seemed a bit confused and frustrated. "It's a lot to think about now. I want things to stay the same but I'm not even sure they can, if I turn out to be pregnant that is." "Just out of curiosity," I asked realizing something for the first time since we'd started the conversation "am I right in thinking that you want to have my baby?" "When you put it like that it sounds like I planned to get you into bed and tried to get myself pregnant." "Did you?" I was surprised by my own question. The possibility hadn't even occurred to me until the question left my lips. "No," she replied a little too quickly and determinedly. "Well maybe not consciously," she added, a little flustered. "Well I guess I had been thinking about it before but I was thinking more along the lines of asking you and even then it had just been a thought. It hadn't actually occurred to me to sleep with you until we were there sitting on the couch and I was such a mess last night and guess I somehow figured if something happened it would be ok and if it didn't well it would still be ok." She looked flustered and more than a little guilty. "Look, I'm really sorry, I guess I have been feeling more than a little lonely lately. It was selfish of me to put you into this position without even asking you but." her voice trailed off. I sighed. It was impossible for me to stay mad at her. I should be but I couldn't fault her for feelings I more than understood myself. "I understand Setsu. I don't exactly agree with your methods but I do understand them. "Mamoru?" She said so softly, almost a whisper. "Yes?" I felt almost weary and somewhat confused. "What would you have said if I'd asked?" Why did she have to ask that; the one question I wasn't sure I could answer. I just stared at her for a while, looking deeply into her eyes almost sure I could see a glimpse of the innocent girl she had once been. Was there anything I had ever denied her? "I don't think, I have ever denied you anything Setsu. It might have taken a while, but I think I would have said yes." Had I not seen with my own eyes, I wouldn't have been sure it was true. A tear ran down her cheek. I don't think she had cried in over ten years, not that I had seen anyway. "If I'm not pregnant, will you still say yes if I ask you again?" I paused. This meant a lot to her, almost everything. "Yes." **************************************************************************** *******  
  
  
  
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	2. finding love

Fate, Fortune and Friendship- Chapter 2  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
  
It was strange that things went back to normal between us with an ease that was almost   
eerie. We were certainly closer than we'd ever been.   
  
I had never had reason to even consider what anyone might have thought of our   
relationship. I couldn't even begin to think what people saw when they saw us. We didn't   
exactly put on a public display; it wasn't in either of our characters. Did they see us as merely   
friends or something more? I have an idea they suspected something far more complex however,   
and what we were was certainly that.  
  
In business we worked seamlessly as if with one mind. We had just closed a deal with a   
small software development company for mass production of their product. I suspect we had   
them both confused and mesmerized. Our suggestions to them had been in a continuous flow   
of sentences started and completed in a seamless exchange of thoughts. I hoped we could   
continue in the same manner once we had Mizuno and her unknown partner sitting before us.   
They were due in a matter of minutes.   
  
I was particularly interested in this deal. Setsuna had already warned me that it wasn't   
wise to be so sure I wanted to invest in their product but there was something inexorably   
intriguing to me about it. Ms. Mizuno actually claimed she had invented stable, inexpensive,   
holographic technology. Today we would see if their product worked. If it did, it would change   
everything. As their venture capitalists we would be sitting on an enormously profitable   
investment if her claims turned out to be true.  
  
Setsuna leaned against my desk staring out the window at the sea of cars on the highway   
far below. She seemed far away in thought.  
  
"Have you checked as yet I asked?"  
  
"No, I've been delaying. It's odd. You'd think I'd be more curious, but I'm more than   
a little scared."  
  
I placed one hand over her own. "No rush, but remember I'm as curious as you are."  
  
"You are?" She seemed surprised.  
  
"Of course I am," I assured her. "I am as intrigued by the prospect of you being a father   
as you are in being a mother."  
  
"What a strange pair we make," she commented smiling.   
  
Just then my secretary announced the arrival of a Ms. Mizuno and Ms. Tsukino to see   
us.  
  
Before the women walked into the office I had been certain of many things in life, well   
almost. That night with Setsuna was turning out to be the beginning of a strange period in my   
life and the moment Ms. Mizuno and partner walked in was the momentary climax of a series of   
life-changing events. I had the strangest sensation that things would never be the same in my   
life ever again. I was suddenly certain of nothing, a feeling that framed the rest of the day.  
  
It wasn't anything so dramatic as those romance novels women read. It was something   
significantly baser. I couldn't recall ever experiencing anything even slightly similar to the   
immediate lust that ran through my body the moment she walked through the door. For the   
next few moments my mind only registered one Usagi Tsukino as introduced by Ms. Mizuno.   
On the other hand, that wasn't really my mind.  
  
She was blonde, blue-eyed, petite, curvaceous, and innately sexy as hell and I rudely   
ignored everyone else to check out every inch of her perfect body. I have never been particularly   
fond of blondes. They'd always seemed colorless and bland. In that instant I believe I changed   
my mind. I believe I was contemplating to myself exactly how soft and smooth she was beneath   
her white pantsuit when Setsu discreetly kicked the back of my chair.  
  
I was embarrassed to say the least. If Setsuna had noticed my preoccupation, there was   
no doubt that Ms. Mizuno and Ms. Tsukino had as well. Ms. Mizuno was smiling in an   
understanding fashion that served only to embarrass me further, and Ms. Tsukino, whom I was   
already thinking of as Usagi was blushing intensely.   
  
*******************************************************************************************  
  
  
"What the hell was that about?"  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"You know what I'm talking about."   
  
I did know what she was talking about and quite frankly I was more than a little   
embarrassed to admit it. I had embarrassed Usagi and myself with my schoolboy lusty stares.   
Somehow I had managed to survive the rest of the meeting without further embarrassment. It   
had been hell trying to keep my eyes off her.   
  
"So she's the one," Setsuna said softly and mysteriously.  
  
"What do you mean," I questioned, confused as to what she was getting at.  
  
"You've never looked at another woman like that before. You want her, badly."  
  
"Don't remind me. I've suffered more than enough embarrassment for the day."  
  
"I think she just might be the one you're looking for."  
  
"I wasn't aware I was looking."  
  
"Well then, maybe I was looking for you. I think she's the one."  
  
"You sound like some kind of psychic fortune teller slash matchmaker. What in the   
world is going on in that head of yours? You can't seriously expect me to believe you've been   
looking for a woman for me and that she happens to be it."  
  
"Not just any woman," she reminded, "the right woman."  
  
"Just as I think I know everything about you, you get stranger." She didn't answer.  
  
We were still in my office, sitting on the long, low couch watching the sun set.   
  
"I can't explain it, Mamoru. I just feel like life is changing for us both. Sometimes I am   
so very confused and then there are these moments of pure and utter clarity when I'm so sure of   
what I want and where I'm going. Of course that never lasts too long.  
  
"You know when we were younger how a week used to last forever?" she smiled   
reminiscently not really looking at me, or anything, her eyes simply staring out. "The older we   
got, the shorter the days became, the week seems to skip from Sunday to Sunday so quickly,   
like the world is moving so much faster it's a fight just to keep up with it all. I keep feeling like   
time is moving faster and faster…" Her voice just faded off. I knew just what she meant.   
  
"Setsu," I began, but was unable to finish as I had begun. "Maybe…. Maybe we're just   
at a point in our life when things are changing and everything is just a little weird right now." I   
paused, not sure how or where to continue.   
  
"You're right. I do want Usagi but I don't think this is the right time. If we're going to   
have this baby together, maybe now is not the time for me to be pursuing a relationship."  
  
"Time and opportunity do not wait around for anyone, Mamoru. You and I both saw   
what their technology can do, that is an opportunity for investment neither of us have any   
intention of passing up. You will be working with Usagi for the next couple of months. Who's   
to say what could happen tomorrow or the day after. You have the chance to pursue her now,   
not a month or a year from now. Now is all there is.  
  
"I'm a grown woman. I can certainly take care of myself. You can't give up the chance   
to be happy for me. You've already done more than enough.   
  
"Usagi seems so right. I can feel that somehow. I love you, and trust me when I say I   
would do anything for you. This is what's right… for both of us," she finished with certainty.  
  
"How can you know that?" I questioned, shocked and amazed at what I'd heard her say.   
"I've barely known the woman for a day and all I'm sure of is that I want her in my bed,   
nothing else. How do you know I'll want to spend the rest of my life with her? How do you   
know that you'll be happy, that I'll be happy? I can't just leave you with this baby and run off   
to pursue another woman I know nothing of. I love you. You are the closest person to me in   
this world. If you aren't happy, I won't be happy either."  
  
"Mamoru," she smiled gently, "you are turning this into an everlasting circle. If you're   
happy then I'll be happy and you can be happy if I'm happy ok? I believe Usagi can make you   
happy; don't ask me how or why. I just do. "So make me happy and do what I say! Go get her!"  
  
  



	3. Chapter 3

Fate Fortune, and Friendship- Chapter3  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
DON'T FORGRT TO REVIEW  
  
Unwilling to disappoint Setsuna, out of fear of what she would do to me if I did, and   
the added fact that she had pinpointed exactly what I wanted, I decided to follow her advice.   
Getting around to asking Usagi out was far more difficult than I had ever expected however.   
She was slippery. I kept meaning to do it but I swear it were as though she knew I wanted to   
and she always managed an escape before I even tried.   
  
I was not surprised she was scared of me after my pathetic behavior that first day. It   
seems every time I get around her I become this pathetic, drooling, horny, boy. I feel like I'm   
going through puberty all over again. A man can only have a hard on so many times before he   
starts punching things and that's precisely what I was doing at the moment.  
  
I was at the gymn abusing a punching bag. A month ago my life had been under   
control. Recently however, it seemed everything around me was suddenly an out of control   
tornado that followed me everywhere I went. My best friend wanted to have my child, while I   
had a growing obsession with this woman I'd just met and my work seemed to be the only calm   
in the storm.  
  
In that first business meeting we learned Usagi had had the money to finance the first   
legs of the research required and she handled the business end of things for their budding   
business. When finally they had their product almost complete and ready for marketing   
however, they needed far more money than Serena's hefty accounts could provide and direction   
that neither of them had, which is where Setsuna and I came in. As venture capitalists we were   
prepared to sink millions into, what we hoped, would be a successful venture and we'd lend our   
time and advice to make sure it turned out that way.  
  
Working with Usagi was proving to be as difficult as I had expected. She was the   
ultimate contradiction. She was an incredibly sexy woman completely unaware of her own   
beauty. She was confident, but seemingly only when it came to business. She was quiet,   
thoughtful, shy, and damn it she was avoiding me like the plague.   
  
Whenever I came around she became this skittish little kitten, which was as amusing as   
it was frustrating. I could tell it was my presence she was reacting to. I make her nervous when   
most of all I want to put her at ease.   
  
I punched the bag hard, sending it swinging in the opposite direction. There was a   
woman sitting on a piece of equipment staring at me in a most provocative way, with her ample   
bosom thrust out for my inspection, her nipples pointing directly at me through the thin   
cotton material of her sports bra. It was as open an invitation I had ever seen and for a moment   
I was actually tempted, mostly because she reminded me of Usagi, whose vision was following   
me everywhere.  
  
It didn't take long to notice the differences, however. Where Usagi was undoubtedly   
delicate and soft, this woman's body was hard and athletic, a testament to hours spent in the   
gymn. Her hair was long and blonde, but I doubted that was natural, it was certainly nothing   
like the golden wheat-colored silkiness of Usagi's tresses. Her eyes were blue, but Usagi's were   
like a brilliant sparkling lagoon and hers a dull sky. Usagi was ruining me for the rest of the   
female sex and that proved to be one of the most frustrating thoughts of the day.  
  
I punched harder. The more I thought about it the more frustrated I became. I fell back   
on the determination that had gotten me to where I was now. I made a resolution. Usagi would   
be in my bed before the next week was out and I added a nicely muttered curse, a rather   
irreverent punctuation to my vow and as if to say amen, I kicked the bag hard, watching it   
swing back and forth as if agreeing with me.   
*******************************************************************************************  
  
Only a day later, I found myself approaching the offices Ami and Usagi, maintained in a   
brand new office building not far away from mine. This was an easier deal than many others I   
had encountered and things were moving along quickly. Both women were receptive to our   
ideas and I was discovering Usagi had a natural knack for business, despite her inexperience.  
  
I reached the door of Ami's office, and knowing she was waiting for me and wouldn't   
mind my sudden entrance, I intended to push the door open, but rudely and rather   
immaturely, at the sound of muted voices I paused to eavesdrop on the conversation between   
the two women inside.  
  
"Oh please! He doesn't want a relationship with me and I certainly do not want one   
with him!" one of the voices stated emphatically.  
  
"Not to be egotistical Usagi, but I am rarely ever wrong and anyone would have to be a   
fool not to notice the way he stares at you. He wants you so badly it's almost embarrassing and   
you can't expect me to believe you don't find him attractive. Hell! Even I find him attractive   
and I got nicknamed "The Nun," in high school!"  
  
"I'm not a complete idiot, Ami. I think everyone knows what he wants. My problem is   
I'm not sure I'm willing to give him what he wants. He doesn't even know me, all he wants is a   
roll in the sack and he could just as easily find another woman for his purpose. In fact I know   
quite a few who would be happy to oblige. I'd gladly give him a list. If it's my features he's   
attracted to, I'm sure Mina would fit his bill perfectly."  
  
Ami sighed. "Usually I'm not the one to point this out Usagi, but you are becoming   
quite boring!"  
  
"Ami!" Usagi gasped.  
  
"Well you are! An absolutely gorgeous man has the hots for you and all you can think   
of is some ridiculous idea of a relationship, which I assure you is the last thing you need right   
now. What you really need is some fun. An affair with man like Mamoru Chiba is the perfect   
solution to your problem. Life is short, live it up!"  
  
I could just imagine her face at the sound of that statement. It must have been a mirror   
of my own. My mouth was hanging slightly open at the words that had just left the mouth of   
one Ami Mizuno.   
  
She had, to me, been the definitive image of a scientist. She was quiet, unassuming, and   
reserved. She was quite possibly the most brilliant person I have ever met. It had never occurred   
to me, not even in my most surreal imaginings that she would ever make such a suggestion.   
  
I can't say it was a suggestion I minded however. Any encouragement to Usagi would   
be good for me. I waited a while longer, listening for her reaction.  
  
"Ami? Are you possessed? Should I call Rei or that Taoist Monk we met to cast out   
whatever strange spirit has possessed you? I can't believe you even suggested that!"  
  
"Why not? Neither Mina nor Rei are here I feel I must also share their expected   
opinions with you and for once I agree with them. You've been living in this world of your   
own for a while now. It's time you get out and enjoy your life.  
  
"Besides as long as you know what you're getting into, there's no harm done right?"  
  
"I suppose," I heard her say somewhat hesitantly. My heart - and other body parts -   
nearly leaped for joy at her reluctant agreement. It seemed things just might go my way.   
  
"He is gorgeous isn't he?" I could almost hear the smile in her voice as she said the   
words and my ego got a boost. I could easily imagine myself preening in front of the mirror. I   
popped that thought bubble, sending the ridiculous thought back to the mirrored halls of   
vanity from whence it came and turned the doorknob.  
  
Guiltily, they both turned brilliant shades of red as I entered the room and I couldn't   
resist a small smile, one that was merely a fill in for the enormous grin I was hiding somewhere   
inside.   
  
"Hello ladies."   
*******************************************************************************************  
  
As it turned out asking her out after that would prove to be much easier although I   
have to admit that I played cat and mouse for a while and this time I was definitely the cat. Call   
me cruel but I felt a certain need for payback after she'd played hard to get for so long. I turned   
the tables, which while it played havoc with the timing of my resolution, provided a sort of   
sadistic satisfaction.   
  
I knew she was expecting me to say the words at any moment. We flirted, we played the   
games and just when I was breathing down her elegant little neck, making her know just how   
much I wanted her, and giving her the definite feeling that I was about to ask her… I stopped. I   
didn't ask, and by the time the week was nearly over I could tell she was confused and annoyeD  
and maybe a little frustrated as well.  
  
What I didn't expect was for her to catch me at my game and put a stop to it. It   
occurred in the midst of one of my twisted attempts to set her off kilter and mess with her   
desires as much as she had with mine. She turned around swiftly and asked me out. I was   
stunned for a moment but I recovered. God bless Women's Lib.   
*****************************************************************************************  
  
DON'T FORGRT TO REVIEW 


	4. Chapter 4

Fate, Fortune, and Friendship-Chapter 4  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
  
It never fails to amaze me how much we live most of our lives with assumptions; so   
many naïve assumptions, about life and most importantly about people. My own assumptions   
were at the moment the reason for my surprise, although considering all that had recently   
occurred I really shouldn't have been. I was quickly learning however, that everyday was a   
whole new adventure. I has assumed, at this point, after days of working with her that I knew   
enough about Usagi to predict her behaviors. My perceptions were obviously flawed.  
  
Tonight had certainly been a lesson in never assuming you know everything about   
anyone. Usagi had been quite a surprise tonight and a pleasant, if unnerving, one at that.   
  
As I watched her sitting across from me in the chic Kamadao bar, I began to analyze the   
situation I found myself in and came to what I thought was the correct conclusion: She had   
resigned herself to an affair with me, but with a surprisingly amazing amount of energy.   
Whatever it was I wasn't complaining at the moment.  
  
It seemed a whole new Usagi had emerged from the shell of the reserved young woman   
I thought I'd known. This wasn't the incredibly sexy 'girl' who'd walked into my office. The   
'woman' before me was of an entirely different species altogether. She was like and American   
southern belle, a luscious ball of barely controlled sexual energy.   
  
My eyes unapologetically roamed her figure appreciating every square inch of exposed   
and covered flesh, for a moment lingering on that area of her silky smooth thigh where the little   
black dress rode high on one thigh giving a tantalizing hint of future possibilities. Her silky   
dark pink lips that were screaming to be kissed opened to reveal perfect rows of white teeth   
when she laughed that delicate little laugh of hers. Her thick dark lashes fluttered seductively   
opening their soft curtains to expose shimmering lagoon-blue eyes that taunted me with their   
flirtatious invitations. She was simply stunning, more so than I had expected was even possible.  
  
She had chosen this place, seeing as how she had asked me out rather than the other   
way around as was originally planned. This however, was much tamer and far less shocking than   
our previous entertainment. I had never for a moment thought Usagi the type to enjoy such   
entertainment, but I reminded myself quickly that tonight like all my days recently, was just   
one surprise after another.  
  
Almost an hour ago we'd attended a rather 'stunning' performance of "The Word is   
SEX" performed by Team Amadera, a troupe of singers and dancers. It was a rather erotic show   
on one theme and one theme only: sex. I had been surprised by her choice even as I considered   
it somewhat appropriate. After all, it had been a prominent thought in my mind almost   
constantly since meeting Usagi.   
  
After that 'interesting' theatrical event, we'd arrived here at club Kamadao where I was   
basking in her warmth. I wasn't the only one staring at this blonde goddess in wonderment,   
however. Every guy in the room seemed to have taken note of just how vibrantly sensual she   
was tonight. She was filled with so much light and energy and yet… I think I felt it was all one   
strange erotically tinted vision, a dream world she'd somehow created through means unknown.   
It was a dream I only truly awoke from when the bright morning sunlight pierced my eyelids   
and I awoke next to her in my bed.  
  
There was no forgetting how we'd wound up here, in my bed wrapped up in each   
other's arms. The culmination of days of sexual tension and one special night climaxed only   
when our flirtations ended with the melding of our bodies. I had known all night that this had   
been her intention what I hadn't expected was how good it would be or the way I'd feel later.  
  
Now, when the warm afterglow of exquisite, mind shattering sex had faded, for some   
strange reason, I felt like a bastard. I felt unspeakably guilty. It was like I had taken advantage of   
her in some way and that made absolutely no sense.   
  
Long after she thought I'd fallen asleep and I'd assumed the same of her, I felt a tear   
trickle down my chest. Was it something I'd done? I suspect it was something I had taken note   
of in the back of my mind but chosen to ignore.   
  
Her head was now resting comfortably on my chest, rising and falling with my own   
breathing. Her long silky blonde hair spread out all over me as she slept deeply and   
comfortably, one long leg wrapped comfortable around mine. It was a comfortable position for   
me, one I was enjoying in a way that was unusually deeply emotional. We fit together perfectly,   
and lying here like this felt so right and still there was something wrong.  
  
She'd tried so hard to do what Ami had suggested, I thought. In fact, I'd have to say   
she'd succeeded magnificently if not for that one moment. I'd even say she enjoyed herself,   
becoming this other person. It had all been a game though, one she was remarkable good at,   
unless she actually let reality in for a while and allowed herself to feel something, like I   
suspected she had late last night. There was something that had bothered her about what she'd   
done and I suspect it might have been because the fact that she wasn't exactly a woman who ran   
around having affairs and I was almost positive she never had sex on a first date.  
  
I suppose I could have allayed her fears or disappointment in herself, whatever it was. I   
think that's partly why I felt so guilty really. I could have stopped her from feeling like this by   
letting her know the simple truth. I hadn't had any intention of this being an affair. I had   
merely gone along with what she had expected, because I think it was the only reason she went   
out with me. As far as I was concerned, however, this was for keeps.  
  
  
  
I was still thinking about last night while I sat at my desk. I had simply laid there for so   
long holding her enjoying her warmth and regretting that I had not been more perceptive   
earlier. It seemed that was a recurring wish lately.  
  
It scared me that Setsuna was right. Even when she was pretending to be this Belle, she   
was so unique, so special. I'd never so much as paid attention to the way a woman's mouth   
moved when she spoke, when she smiled, when she took a sip of a drink. I'd never even known   
how enticing that could be. These were just some of the little things I noticed about her; like   
the way her fingers traced the edge of a glass while she talked to me. Usagi was everything I   
wanted.  
  
Setsuna being right certainly complicated my life somewhat. I had secretly been hoping   
she was wrong and that this lust I had for Usagi would be solved with a few dates followed by   
enjoyable nights in bed. It seemed just one night out with her was enough to set the tornadoes   
of confusion awhirl in my mind, in my life.  
  
It wasn't that I wasn't grateful for a reprieve from my usual loneliness, but it was all just   
so sudden and so much all at once. I felt like I was being overwhelmed by own emotions. It was   
giving me a headache.  
  
"You look like shit." Setsuna announced as she walked into my office.   
  
"I feel like shit," I replied, leaning back in my chair staring up at her. She was as usual a   
picture of perfection. She raised an eyebrow, and oddly enough she looked more worried than   
the questioning look such a gesture would normally suggest.  
  
"The date didn't go well?" she asked, sounding surprised and a tad bit confused.  
  
I snorted. "It was great. In fact if you ask me it went a little too well." She gave me a   
look that without uttering a word demanded my explanation.   
  
"She is perfect. Although I have to say last night might have gone a bit further than it   
should have."  
  
"You slept with her," she stated simply grasping that fact instantly. "Why is that a bad   
thing?"  
  
"Last night it was like she was a different person. She was so vibrant, so flirtatious and   
then, we went back to my place and that quite frankly just might have been the best experience   
of my life. It wasn't until afterwards that I realized that I probably should have taken her home   
instead of going back to my place?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I don't think she's ever done anything like that before. She thinks we're   
having an affair. I guess she figures that the affair will be over once our business together is   
completed."  
  
"How did she draw that conclusion?" Was I just imagining things or was that an   
accusatory tone?  
  
"Ami."  
  
"Ami?" She hadn't expected that answer.  
  
"Yes, Ami. I overheard them talking and she convinced Serena that she needed some   
'fun' in her life and that an affair with me was just what the doctor ordered." I was lost in   
thought for a moment recalling the conversation. "Now that I think about it," I said, "more to   
myself than to Setsu, "I think there was more to that conversation than I caught."  
  
"Meaning what exactly?"  
  
"I think the suggestion was supposed to be therapeutic, as though she were trying to get   
over something… or someone." I frowned at that.   
  
"I feel used," I said teasingly.  
  
"How does it feel?" Setsu asked.  
  
"Haven't decided completely as yet, but last night… it felt damn good."   
*******************************************************************************************  
Around midday I stopped by Usagi's office to see her. I recalled this morning,   
remembering how unnerved she had been to wake up in my arms. It wasn't that she had   
forgotten what had occurred but I could tell she had no idea how to react to being with me. It   
had made for quite a few awkward moments.  
  
It seemed her innocent naivete had returned with the rising sun. Suddenly she was the   
person I thought I'd known and gone was the seductive temptress that had taken over her body   
last night. She hadn't been sure what to say after a night like the one we'd shared and quite   
frankly I hadn't either. I think we chose to forsake words and settled instead for cups of coffee,   
mundane, nervous conversation and a gentle kiss goodbye.   
  
Now I entered her office intent on discussing what had happened between us. She was   
sitting on the edge of her desk, her back turned at an angle to the door, and a pair of glasses I   
hadn't seen before was perched on the end of her nose. It was, for lack of a better word, cute. I   
don't think she even heard me walk in, she was so absorbed in the thick pile of papers she held   
in her hands.  
  
I approached her as quietly as possible and brushed the soft petals of a single red rose   
against her cheek. She nearly jumped a mile and I chuckled at the sight.   
  
"Mamoru!" She screeched, dropping the papers in her hand on the floor and whirling   
around to face me.  
  
"Usagi." I stated simply, but teasingly.  
  
"What are you doing here?" She questioned as she dropped to her knees, to pick up her   
papers.   
  
"I came to see you of course," I replied. "It seems I caught you in the middle of   
something."  
  
"Oh, it's nothing. It's just a manuscript a friend of mine sent me to read. She's writing   
a romance novel. This is the first half."  
  
"You like that stuff?"  
  
"You aren't going to think I'm silly if I say I do will you?" she honestly looked as   
though she'd be hurt if I said I did.  
  
"If I say I do, will you hate me?"  
  
"Maybe," she replied, a small smile spreading across her face.  
  
"Then absolutely not!" I announced emphatically. "In fact, I think you're brilliant for   
reading them, absolutely perfect in fact," I continued. I would have gone on but I'd already   
achieved my goal. She was smiling brilliantly.  
  
"Would you like to join me for lunch?" I asked. "If you don't mind taking a break from   
that engrossing novel, that is. Must be really good, you didn't even hear me come in."  
  
"It is. Mina is a better writer than I ever thought possible, but I rarely refuse offers of   
food so… why not?"   
*****************************************************************************************  
  
I was convinced this girl would eat anything. She didn't want to stick around inside a   
restaurant so we found the first street vendor and bought something to go. I wasn't even sure   
what it was I was eating. What I did know was that it tasted incredibly fattening and it was on a   
stick, she seemed to be enjoying it however.   
  
"How can you eat this stuff?" I questioned, fascinated by the pure bliss on her face as   
she savored the taste.  
  
"It tastes good! That's how," She replied simply.  
  
"Yes, but shouldn't you be a blimp after eating this stuff?"  
  
"It's a mystery," she replied happily. "My name might refer to a cute fuzzy creature but   
a 'dear and loving friend' once called me a skinny little pig after I consistently ate my lunch and   
at least half of hers in high school and never gained an ounce. I love food!"  
  
I smiled at her enthusiasm. I wasn't too caught up in her to forget the reason I had   
asked her out for lunch however.   
  
"We need to talk about last night," I stated simply. The smile never faded from her face   
although I could swear I saw her eyes darken.  
  
"You were wonderful," if that's what you wanted to know," she said simply. "I had   
fun."  
  
"I'm not insecure in my abilities Usagi. What I wanted to know was if you were ok with   
what happened between us."  
  
"Why wouldn't I be ok with it?" She sounded just the slightest bit defensive.  
  
"I'm not sure. Tell me why you were crying last night." Her smile faded for a moment.   
  
"Maybe you were just that good." She was smiling slightly but there was tentative note   
to her voice.  
  
"Usagi," I warned. "Was it something I did?"   
  
"No," she whispered emphatically. "Really, it was nothing. I cry all the time you know.   
In addition to being a skinny little pig, I'm also known as a big crybaby," she said trying to   
blow off the whole thing.  
  
"If you wont tell me, I'm afraid I'm going to have to guess," I said. She looked up at   
me almost challenging me to come up with the truth. "Contrary to that seductive woman you   
played last night, you are actually quite innocent aren't you Usa? In fact, I'd make a bet you've   
never done anything like that before. What I don't understand is why?"   
  
"I don't know," she replied softly. She hadn't denied anything I'd said. "I guess I just   
figured that Amy was right and I needed to have some fun and I thought it was a good idea at   
the time. But when it was over I felt like I was betraying…." Her voice trailed off.  
  
"Who?" I asked. I was stunned by the way my stomach felt as if it would cave in at the   
thought that there could be someone else.  
  
"It doesn't matter, he's gone now. He died."   
  
I was instantly ashamed of myself, not only for being jealous of a dead man, but for   
being almost relieved at hearing of his death.   
  
"I'm sorry," I said, expressing both my sympathy and my apology at once.   
  
"No. I'm sorry," she began. I don't think I am cut out for this affair business; it's just   
not me. Last night I thought if I was more like my mother wanted me to be and if I followed   
Ami's suggestions I would feel better but…"  
  
"I think I've mislead you Usagi."   
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I overheard Ami suggesting you have an affair with me and I suppose I wanted to take   
advantage of that. I never intended for this to be a short affair and I knew that's what you   
thought, when you asked me out. I like you a lot; I don't know if you want to have a   
relationship with me or not but I am very interested in you Usa."  
  
She seemed dumbstruck. She merely stared at me wide eyed. "I don't know what to   
say," she finally muttered.  
  
"Say you'll go out with me again. Tonight?"  
  
"Ok."   
*******************************************************************************************  
  



	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Fate, Fortune, and Friendship  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
  
I had thought only women did what I was doing right now. I was primping and   
preening in front of my bathroom mirror. It was suddenly very important that I look absolutely   
perfect.   
  
I did have other concerns beyond my impressive features however. I was very curious as   
to what she would be like tonight. I could easily bring up an image of her in my head as she was   
on out last date. The vision of her teasing me in the seductive fashion of a silver screen   
Hollywood actress did things to my body that made me happy I was in the privacy of my own   
home.  
  
To say I was excited about this date would be quite an understatement. In a useless   
effort to keep my body under control, I conjured up the memory of the conversation we'd had   
previously. I was curious as to exactly what she'd meant when she referred to her mother.  
  
It hadn't really been so much what she'd said as how she'd said it. What was it that her   
mother had wanted her to be and how did that relate to the man she'd lost? The loss must have   
been somewhat recent judging by the pained look I had seen on her face earlier.   
  
I was still ashamed that I could be so jealous of his place in her life. He wasn't even alive   
that I should be his rival for her affections. I was quickly becoming possessive of her affections   
and it was all happening far too fast. I wanted to know everything about her and it scared me.  
  
I opened the bathroom door and posed seductively in the open door in nothing but   
my boxers and a wide grin.   
  
"A little excited aren't we?" Setsu questioned humorously as she watched me from the   
couch in the corner of my bedroom. I looked down at my underpants wondering if by some   
strange phenomena, there was something I hadn't noticed. From the look of things, everything   
was in place and under control. She chuckled lightly at my interpretation.  
  
"That's an interesting interpretation, but I was referring to your mood. I assume I was   
right about Usagi," she stated. "Everything is going well?"   
  
"In more ways than I can say," I replied happily. "How many ways can I thank you? She   
is so perfect it's almost scary."   
  
"I'm happy for you," she stated simply.  
  
I looked at the outfit laid out on the bed. It wasn't the one I had chosen but that was   
no surprise. I gave her a questioning glance.  
  
"I couldn't leave it up to you to chose the right outfit. That would be courting   
disaster."  
  
"Gee thanks," I muttered sarcastically."  
  
"I'm sure you'll find appropriate ways to thank me."  
  
"And I'm sure you'll find appropriate ways to make me to pay."  
  
"So where are you taking her? Not the usual I hope. I don't think Fair Ground is her   
style."  
  
"No, I don't suppose Usagi is too interested in our rum fetish."  
  
"It's not a fetish, it's a matter of taste."  
  
"I am taking her to Daigo." I stated simply. Setsu seemed reasonably impressed. Daigo   
was quite frankly the best place I knew of. The restaurant was in the garden of a temple and the   
dining room was private and traditional. The food was so exquisite as to be unearthly in both   
taste and presentation, something I was sure Usagi would appreciate, and the atmosphere was   
absolutely magical.   
  
"No distractions, private, impressive, exclusive and expensive."   
  
"I take it you approve then?" I said smiling, my good mood infecting my tone.  
  
"Yes. You've finally done something right."  
  
  
By the time I arrived at Usagi's apartment I had meditated myself into a calm, cool and   
collected state of mind. I did not need to seem like an overexcited geek on his first date with the   
head cheerleader. It wasn't my first date with her; I shouldn't be so unnaturally excited and   
downright giddy.  
  
When she opened the door however, my calm state of mind was shattered into a   
million pieces and once again I was a rather sickening combination of the overexcited geek and   
the horny, drooling schoolboy. She had a Madonna-like smile on her perfect face and her long   
blonde hair hung to her waist in dazzling sun kissed layers. She was wearing a short dress that   
flattered every curve and left just enough to the imagination to be utterly tantalizing.  
  
"You have to change!" I announced, like the ass I was proving myself to be with every   
day that broke over the horizon.  
  
"What!" She snapped, stunned and confused.  
  
"You can't wear that," I announced as I stepped into her spacious apartment.  
  
"Why not? Is it too formal, too informal? What?" She was just about in a panic, as she   
surveyed her outfit.   
  
"Neither. It's too short." Explaining this was turning out to be far more complex than I   
expected. She gave me that look that told me I had pretty much stomped all over her liberated,   
feminist ideals. It wasn't a pleasant stare.  
  
"Before you throw me out in the belief that I am some chauvinist bastard, let me   
explain." I pleaded. She raised an eyebrow but said nothing.   
  
"We're going to Daigo," I began, which elicited a surprised look. "The outfit is nothing   
short of lovely it's just that we'll be seated on the floor and to spare your sense of modesty as   
well as for your comfort not to mention my roving eyes, you might want to wear something   
less… enticing." I looked at her expectantly waiting to see if she would still like to crush my   
windpipe beneath her high heels.  
  
"I suppose that makes sense," she said with only the slightest hesitation. Why didn't   
you tell me this before?"   
  
"I'm sorry, I guess I forgot." I felt like an ass. I probably should have just kept my   
mouth shut and enjoyed the view but my conscience would have been like a sword in my side   
all night.  
  
"Well if you'll give me a few minutes, I'll change into something more… appropriate."   
She stated simply. It was only after the first fifteen minutes that I realized I was probably being   
punished. I had paced the entire apartment, looked at all her pictures, examined her setup, and   
tested all her chairs. She still hadn't come out of hiding.  
  
A little more than a half hour later she finally deigned to visit her presence upon me.   
She had changed into a midnight blue pants and a low v-necked white blouse. She still looked   
incredibly sexy but far more comfortable. I smiled and raised an eyebrow.  
  
"It's still you," I teased. "I was expecting a whole different person by now." She blushed   
brightly.  
  
"Sorry I took so long. I had to find a whole new outfit and then I had to change my   
makeup and my hair to match and I had to find shoes…."  
  
"It's ok, it's my fault anyway." She didn't contradict me. It was then that I took a   
glance at my watch. "Damn!"  
  
"What's the matter?" She questioned.   
  
"We just missed our reservation."  
  
"Oh Mamoru, I'm so sorry." She was so sincere she was almost distraught. I sank down   
comfortably into the softness of her couch.  
  
"Don't worry I'm sure we'll find something to do," I said suggestively.  
  
"I don't think so buddy! I'm hungry and I'll be damned if you're not feeding me   
tonight." She was looking down at me indignantly.  
  
I couldn't help but smile. "What do you have in mind?" I asked smoothly. I was   
curious as to what other unique forms of entertainment she had in mind. If tonight was   
anything like the last one it would definitely be interesting.  
  
"Well," she began and by the tone of her voice I was suddenly wary. "I was thinking we   
would go back to your place…" she paused for effect, "and you could cook!"  
  
I stared at her blankly for a while as the words seeped into my thick skull. Somehow   
that was not the way I hoped that sentence would be completed.  
  
"You want me to cook?" I asked almost completely disbelieving what I'd heard.  
  
"Don't tell me you can't. You're a successful bachelor living alone you must cook   
something."  
  
"I'm not horrible, although judging from the contents of your refrigerator I'm quite   
probably better than you are," I mocked lightly. She didn't seem the least bit insulted. I   
guessed she'd heard that before. It was ironic that someone who loved food as much as she did   
neither had any around, or was capable of making any.  
  
"You looked through my refrigerator? She questioned, rather stunned."  
  
"It got pretty boring out here after the first ten minutes or so," I replied sheepishly.  
  
She shook her head at me like a mother at a disobedient child. "Well since you've   
obviously seen the contents of my refrigerator… and probably my cupboards, or lack thereof"   
she added accusatorily, "you know I can't feed either of us. So whatever mediocre skills you   
have at cooking will have to suffice."  
  
"Alright then," I agreed. I suppose we could have gone elsewhere but being alone with   
her served my purposes much better. "Let's go," I announced.  
  
She smiled at me sheepishly. "Just one second, I forgot something." With that she ran   
towards her bedroom. I could hear things being tossed around and the occasional thud. No   
more than five minutes later she emerged, all out of breath and flustered.   
  
I guess, forgetting something was just an excuse to change again because now she was   
wearing fitted jeans and a simple white shirt. She still looked incredible. Was there nothing she   
could wear that would tone down her sexuality?   
  
"Are you sure that's what you want to wear?" I asked teasingly.   
  
"What's wrong now?" She asked, rather annoyed.  
  
"Nothing you can fix."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"   
  
"There's nothing you can wear or take off that will make me want you any less at any   
given moment." That caused her face to flush brightly.   
  
"Thanks… I think," she muttered.   
************************************************************************************************  
*****************************************************************************  
  



	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Fate, Fortune, and Friendship  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
  
It made me smile inside how well we worked together in the kitchen. She, of course,   
gave the greater responsibility of the preparation of the meal to me, something I knew I should   
be grateful for. I think it was the fact that she tried to use a rather enormous knife to murder a   
poor carrot. After we'd settled the issue of knives, our conversation developed further, mostly   
to provide me with as much information as possible about her.  
  
"So, tell me about your mother," I all but demanded right after I made sure she wasn't   
going to lose any fingers to the knife she was using to chop vegetables into smaller pieces for a   
salad. I was busy working on a sauce for our pasta.  
  
"My mother? Why my mother?" She was confused by my random question I supposed,   
as there was no preemptory discussion of her family all evening.  
  
"You mentioned her earlier today, I'm just curious."  
  
"Curiosity killed the human trying to find out why the cat died," she replied.  
  
"What!"  
  
"Never mind," she muttered. "Well anyway, I suppose you saw the pictures of her at   
my place?"  
  
"I did?" I questioned surprised. There had been quite a few people but none resembling   
a mother.  
  
"If you saw my pictures, then you did. I'm not surprised you didn't recognize any of   
them as my mother. She was the perfect and beautiful blonde on the boat.  
  
"That's your mother!" I was stunned. I remembered the picture easily. It was a rather   
posed black and white image of a young blonde woman on the stern of a boat, relaxing and   
laughing. She looked seductive and exotic, not unlike Serena had on our first date.  
  
"I get that a lot," Usagi said. No one will believe that a woman who looks like that   
actually gave birth. She likes to go out and pretend she's my sister, and embarrassingly enough,   
people believe her. She is a rather unusual mother to say the least."  
  
"Surely she doesn't look like that now? That was an old picture right?" She seemed   
amused by my questions.  
  
"No. That picture is only about five years old. My father's hobby is photography and   
my mother is his muse. We were on a vacation of sorts, when he took that one. I liked it a lot   
so I kept it.   
  
"When I was younger I wanted to be just like her. She had this way about her that was   
just so charming, seductive I suppose; men would literally fall over themselves to do whatever   
she wanted. She adored the attention. Oddly enough my father isn't the jealous type so he   
never paid too much attention to her ways. I think somehow, he was confident in the fact that   
she loved him and I think she did, though not nearly as much as he loved her.   
  
I never understood how she and my father ever got together. They're such different   
people. He was so quiet and unassuming and she's so flirtatious and lively.  
  
"When I was a child she used to treat me as though I were some kind of doll she would   
play dress up with and all her friends found it quite amusing. I think I even liked it for a little   
while, the attention anyway. I was always on display, dressed up like a Dresden china doll.  
  
"The older I got however, the more I realized she was trying to turn me into herself and   
I got annoyed at the whole thing. I guess I was a lot more like my father than she preferred. She   
wanted a daughter exactly like herself and the older I got the less I was what she wanted me to   
be.   
  
She would give me all these hints about how to get men to do what you want and how   
to wrap my daddy around my little finger. That was not something I needed work with, believe   
me. I was Daddy's little girl from the moment I came into this world.  
  
She interfered in every date I ever had, when I was younger. She wanted me to wear my   
makeup a certain way, act a certain way, and in essence be more like her. I learned quickly that   
when she turned on her charm and when I turned mine on we got two different results but   
sometimes I tried anyway. After all, who wouldn't want to have men tripping over themselves   
to fulfill your every wish?" She smiled wryly at that thought.  
  
"What exactly was the effect you got that was so different from hers?" I asked curiously.   
Usagi grinned widely and chuckled softly.  
  
"When my mother turned on her charms, she could flirt for hours endlessly, men flirted   
back, became enamored with her, but they always knew there were limits. At the end of the   
night she was naturally going home with her husband. When I tried to do as my mother did…   
I got every male in the room trying to look down my shirt, get up my skirt, and follow me   
home for less than innocent explorations."  
  
I had to smile and admire how calmly and amusingly she related what was obviously   
not a pleasurable tale at the time. I suppose many things, especially those that occurred when   
you were young, seem amusing in retrospect.   
  
"I take it that wasn't fun at the time?"  
  
"It wasn't all that bad. In fact, it was amusing even then, hearing all the many ways guys   
came up with to try to get into a girl's pants; most of the time anyway."   
  
The tone of her last statement didn't reflect the same casual emotion she'd spoken with   
before. It bothered me.  
  
"Did something happen with one of your more overzealous admirers?" I asked quietly.  
  
"No. I learned quickly to shelf my charms."   
  
"Salad's done!" she announced, ending that path of conversation and mood, as she   
triumphantly gave the colorful mixture a final toss.  
  
I wanted to pry further, but I suspected she'd purposefully ended that conversation.   
  
"The pasta's almost done, I announced."  
  
"Well, while we're waiting," she suddenly spoke, "and because it seems only fair, why   
don't you tell me what you were doing in your younger years? I bet you were turning on your   
charms far more often than I dared to use mine. But I bet you enjoyed the results far more than   
I ever did."   
  
"I didn't do much charming when I was a teenager."  
  
"No?" She asked, seemingly surprised. I was of course flattered that she thought me   
charming, but I'd really have preferred that she hadn't asked since I'd rather not to share the   
unpleasant details of my past with her or anyone else for that matter. Still, it was only fair.  
  
"I didn't have as happy a childhood as you did. My parents died when I was young and   
I spent a couple years in foster care before I skipped out to make my own way. I succeeded and   
here I am," I concluded.  
  
"That's it?" She asked skeptically, with a light touch of sarcasm and disbelief.  
  
"Pretty much."  
  
"I told you the dark secrets of my childhood and you sum yours up in three sentences?"  
  
"Dark secrets?" I asked with sardonic amusement.   
  
She gave me a rather pointed glare that had me fighting to hide the smile that   
threatened to split my face.  
  
"I don't think that's fair. I deserve much more than that!" She announced.  
  
"Ok. What do you want to know?" I had no intention of telling her everything but it   
would satisfy her to ask.  
  
"How did your parents die? What was it like growing up without your parents? Who   
were your friends? When did you leave? How did you get to where you are now?"  
  
"All that huh?" Not bad, I thought. Short answers.  
  
"They died in a car accident when I was seven, and I don't remember too much about   
them. It sucked but it was my life, so I had to live it. Setsuna has been my best friend since I   
was sixteen; we met in school.   
  
"I left the group home I lived in when I was seventeen after seriously pissing off a   
couple foster parents and a two-month stint in juvenile hall for something I didn't do. As for   
how I got here, that's…complicated."  
  
"I like complicated," she stated simply and signaled for me to continue.  
  
"Well if you must know... Working off collected information, I discovered, a couple   
weeks after I left the home that my parents had died with a lot of money in the bank. They'd   
never made a will and because of a lot of mix ups I was basically screwed out of money that   
should have been mine. I hired a lawyer who I promised to pay if we won and I sued the   
government and the banks for control of the money and I won. That's pretty much that"  
  
"Wow! I would never have had the guts to do something like that at seventeen. "   
  
"I had to do something. The thought of spending the rest of my life as a waiter in a   
cheap restaurant made me cringe. Setsuna and I needed a place to live. We were both pretty   
much on our own and she was only fifteen. Horrible things happen to young girls on the   
street."  
  
"You two must be really close." It wasn't a question, but a statement that requested an   
answer nonetheless.  
  
"Yes, we are. We've shared a lot over the years." I looked up from the pot of quickly   
boiling pasta to find her staring at me rather searchingly. She looked reflective but she didn't   
say anything.   
  
"Now that I've told you my deep, dark secrets," I said, moving in for a kiss, her lips   
seem to be asking for, Why don't you tell me about this lost love of yours?"  
  
Her eyes widened in surprise as she recovered from our kiss and my question.   
  
"Lost love?"  
  
"You know, the one you mentioned earlier. The one you feel you betray when you're   
with me."  
  
"Oh…. that one."  
  
"So… ?"  
  
"His name was Seiya," she began slowly. He was the first man I tried my charms on who   
didn't try to get into my pants the first time I met him. He waited a good long while for that,   
until we were married in fact."  
  
I was stunned. She was still so young, no more than twenty-five. I never for a moment   
thought that she could have been married.  
  
"You were married?" She nodded.  
  
"I know." She said, indicating her understanding of my disbelief. My parents thought   
the same thing. Everyone told me I was too young to get married. They were right too. I was so   
foolish and so convinced that I was in love and well… I suppose I was."  
  
"How did he die?"   
  
"Something incredibly silly. Less than a year after we got married he went up to the   
mountains to go skiing with his friends. He decided to try snowboarding and he broke his   
collarbone trying. Everything seemed ok, the bone was set and all was fine and then on his way   
home he had an embolism and he died. A clot developed and traveled through his blood   
stream to his heart."  
  
She said it all in a very matter fact fashion but I could tell it still hurt to talk about it.  
  
"I'm sorry," I said.  
  
"It's alright. I think what hurt the most was that we had this huge fight before he left   
and I never got the chance to say I was sorry, or to tell him goodbye and I was so angry at him   
and at myself.   
  
"He lied to me and I told him to get out of my life. I was just so angry and I had every   
right to be but I still feel so guilty sometimes."  
  
I wanted to say something, but I didn't have a clue as to what I should say, so I said   
nothing. She didn't seem to notice however and continued with her story.  
  
"Seven months after we got married he decided to break the news that he was gay. He'd   
used me, married me, all because he was afraid of his own sexuality. It hurt so much, I couldn't   
deal with even seeing his face so I told him to leave and that was the last time I saw him alive."  
  
I pulled her in close to me for the comfort she needed and kissed her hair. I wished to   
God I could take her pain. I could almost feel her hurt within myself.  
  
"I'm sorry," she whispered. "This is supposed to be a date and here I am telling you all   
the depressing things in my life."  
  
"Better you than me. My depressing stories would have us both laid out on the couch   
with a box of tissues. And quite frankly, there are much more pleasant things I would rather be   
doing on the couch."  
  
"Really?" She asked playfully. "Do you do these things often? By yourself?"  
  
"Touché," I replied. "I almost feel wounded."  
  
"Almost?" She questioned, eyebrow raised.  
  
Standing close to her gave me the opportunity and I took it. I pulled her up against the   
length of my body and kissed her with more passion than I had expected to feel. Her lips were   
so soft and the taste of her mouth was like honey on my tongue. I kissed the corner of her   
mouth, her jaw line, the curve of her neck, her soft hot skin like velvet against my mouth.   
  
I felt drunk with her intoxicating scent and sweet taste. She was like a high. I wanted to   
feel every inch of her beneath my hands and every sweet centimeter of her body.   
  
"I stand corrected," I whispered against her neck. "When I'm not kissing you I feel   
wounded, incomplete actually. You're becoming quite an addiction Usako."  
  
"Oh God!" She breathed out. "I think the pasta's done!"  
  
"What!" For a moment I was stunned senseless, my intoxicated thoughts suddenly   
brought back to reality with the speed and sensation of a train hitting a wall. "How can you   
think of pasta now?" I asked incredulously.  
  
"Because if I don't stop us now we'll never make it to the couch or anywhere else for   
that matter and by then the apartment will be on fire and well I kind of want tonight to last a   
little longer than that."  
  
I kissed her lightly again and let her go, if somewhat unwillingly. I chuckled at the   
thought. I was already on fire. I turned the stove off.  
  
"I suppose that would be a bad thing. Besides, we wouldn't want you to miss a meal   
now would we?" I teased. I received a swift elbow to the ribs.  
  
The rest of the evening was perfect. The pasta was pretty decent and the salad was great,   
proving she wasn't completely inept in the kitchen. She was very proud of herself.   
  
Close to the end of out meal Serena popped yet another question.   
  
"Tell me about Setsuna," she demanded.  
  
"What do you want to know?" I asked, surprised that she wanted to know anything at   
all. I guess you could say almost any questions about my personal life almost seems like and   
invasion to me. Personal questions put me on the defense.   
  
I wasn't used to being very personal with anyone besides Setsuna. Other women in my   
life had wanted to know more about me as well. Somehow I suspected it wouldn't be as easy to   
keep Serena at arms length as it had with them.  
  
"Anything," she replied. "How did you two get to be friends?"  
  
"Setsuna wasn't what you would call popular in school. She was that kid in the corner   
with the dark forbidding expression. I was kind of the same way I guess. I wasn't much of an   
extrovert and I guess identified with what I thought she felt.  
  
She was a freshman and I was a sophomore. One day I noticed she was being picked on   
by some of the more popular girls in school and I figured I'd intervene." Serena smiled. "Yeah I   
know… knight in shining armor and all that. Actually Setsuna proved she could fight her own   
battles when she pretty much punched out both girls before I could even blink and then asked   
me if I needed anything. We've pretty much been friends ever since."  
  
"How did you guys get to be so close though?" The woman just kept pushing didn't   
she? I sighed.   
  
"Setsu's father was a bastard. He needed to pay off some gambling debts so he sold his   
daughter to some other bastard who intended to use her as his personal whore." I heard Serena   
gasp in shock. I guess she never thought a parent could do that to his own child.   
  
"Well anyway, I found out and picked her up before he could lay a hand on her. I guess   
you could say we've been bonded ever since." I left out the part about killing her father. I   
didn't think that was something she needed to know.  
  
"I never thought anyone could do that to their own child," she whispered almost   
disbelievingly.  
  
"There are a lot of screwed up things in this world."  
  
"Yeah, I suppose," she replied, obviously still thinking about the matter.  
  
I was happy to be rid of the subject finally. It wasn't exactly the most uplifting of   
conversations and definitely not the most romantic.   
  
I was happy when she demanded to have a discussion about the paintings on my wall.   
Not having acquired them myself, she had a good laugh at my complete ignorance. I could   
care less about a few uninteresting abstracts however, when there was a beautiful woman in the   
room who was so much more interesting.   
  
After two glasses of wine we did all those things I'd alluded to on the couch and in   
other more comfortable places. It was quite an experience to say the least, a rather pleasurable   
and exciting one to say the very least.  
  
I think it occurred to me later when lying next to her in my bed both of us wide-awake   
but silent, that I was falling completely in love with this woman. When the sun rose on the   
approaching dawn I wouldn't want her to leave. I think I'd have been content to lay there   
forever by her side.   
  
I was still contemplating forever when the phone rang. I was tempted to answer it but   
my body was too languid to respond to any demands. By the fourth ring it was too late to   
make up my mind as the machine switched on.  
  
"Mamoru?" The voice, I instantly recognized as Setsu's came over. "I guess you're not   
there, huh. I know I should probably should have waited to say this but I just couldn't contain   
myself, I have to tell someone and obviously you're the best choice," she continued rather   
hurriedly. "I'm pregnant! I guess you get to be the lucky father. Anyway, sorry you didn't hear   
it from me in person but thanks so much. I love you."   
  
I stared at the ceiling in shock. Setsu was pregnant…with my child. It was downright   
scary. She sounded so happy, more so than I could recall ever hearing. The excitement in her   
voice was so unfamiliar.  
  
"What does she mean, you're the father?" Usagi asked, sitting up suddenly next to me.   
"I thought you were just friends!"  
  
"Look it's not what you think." I stated as she rolled out of bed. I followed her.   
  
"So you're going to tell me you didn't sleep with her? That she lied and she really   
doesn't love you and she isn't having your child?" She snapped, each word like the flick of a   
whip. She was getting dressed hurriedly, obviously angry.  
  
"It's not what you think," I repeated. "We're just friends…"  
  
"Save it for someone who cares!" She retorted angrily. "I can't believe you! All this crap   
about wanting to have a relationship with me was just a load of bullshit! I can't believe I was so   
naïve. I guess you guys really bonded huh!"   
  
She wouldn't allow me a word in edgewise. She wasn't listening to a single word I tried   
to say and before I knew it my own door was being slammed in my face.  
  
"Damnit!" I yelled at the closed door, slamming my fist hard into the wood.   
  
  



	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Fate, Fortune, and Friendship  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
I tried to call her but she didn't pick up the phone. I suspect she deleted my e-mails   
without reading them as well. I believe I used every communication option I could find to no   
avail.  
  
Usagi didn't want to see me, speak to me or even hear my name. For a change, I could   
honestly say this wasn't my fault. All I needed was some time alone with her where I could   
explain this situation. What I feared was that the explanation might just scare her at this point.  
How could I honestly say that Setsuna and I were just friends? We were having a child   
together. Our relationship was strange, even to us.  
  
"Maybe I should try to talk to her," Setsu suggested.  
  
"I doubt she'll want to see you either," I muttered pessimistically, gulping down the   
last remnants of scotch in the glass I held.   
  
"It is you she's mad at not me." She amended as I glared at her. "Her anger is misplaced   
seeing as how this entire situation is my fault."  
  
"As long as we have that straight." I said sourly.  
  
"You're acting like a drunken brat!" she snapped at me. "Sober up and we'll see what we   
can do to fix this problem."  
  
"We?"  
  
"Fine. I'll do it without you, but consider it a favor. You were barely congratulatory   
you know."  
  
"I'm sorry Setsu," I apologized sincerely. "I have been an ass."  
  
"I know. Try to me more sociable, you're going to be a father. I know the woman you   
love isn't talking to you but doesn't mean you can't take a shower and shave."  
  
"I do not…"  
  
"…love Usagi Tsukino? Right. That explains why you've been trying to reach her for   
two days and why you smell like an alcoholic sock and look like a hobo!" she stated   
sarcastically.  
  
"I resent that."  
  
"I plan to be a mother Mamoru but not to you. So get off your ass and get yourself   
cleaned up. I will do my best to get your dear Usagi to listen to reason but if she ever speaks to   
you again you should at least look human if not tempting."   
*******************************************************************************************  
INTERIM- change to Setsuna's point of view for a short while.  
  
I love my best friend; I really do, so much sometimes that it scares me. I would do anything for him really. He is the one person I truly trust with all my heart and soul. He's always taken care of me. He's been both friend, brother and in a few strange moments, lover.   
  
There are times when our relationship confuses me. Sometimes I become so puzzled as to where he ends and I begin, and it is somewhat unnerving. There used to be times when I was almost more than certain that I was in love with him only to have that feeling distorted and twisted and we would once again be where we'd started, closer than friends but less than lovers.  
  
Lately I sense a shift in our relationship, a shift in the path of our lives really. It's almost mystical sometimes how clearly I see into the distance of this path we're on. These sudden moments of clarity are enough to make me break down and cry. Had I been anyone else I might have been hysterical from what I envisioned.   
  
It scares me so much that sometimes I can feel the blood drain from my face and seemingly freeze in my veins, a painful reaction to this future I imagine. It's not my imagination however, things are changing and sometimes, just a little, I'm glad to be aware of it.   
  
The future I see is a dark one, a lonely one, for me anyway. It's a future without Mamoru. It hurts so much to even think that one day we won't be together the way we have been. But everyday that breaks, I prove myself right and I can almost feel my soul being torn apart by the pain of it all.  
I am losing him. The first time I became aware of the possibility I was both scared and angry. I wanted to fight this approaching destiny. I wanted to hang on to what I knew, what I had, but that would have been selfish.  
  
To love Mamoru, the way I do, is to be wiling to give up my own happiness for his. I owe it to him. I refused to let go of all of him however. That is the reason this child grows within me. This child is my personal piece of my best friend, the one part of him I'll never have to let go.  
  
I wasn't entirely clear on what form this destiny would take until I saw Usagi. I recognized the same loneliness in her eyes that I saw in Mamoru's. I wasn't positive until I saw the way he looked at her. I was both miserable and happy in that single moment when suddenly, by means unknown, I was instantly sure that Usagi was his destiny as much as this baby has become mine.   
  
They needed each other and I was determined that they would be together. This is why I was standing outside Usagi's apartment door with hand posed to knock, not quite sure what I'd say when she opened the door.   
  
"Setsuna!" She said, obviously surprised to find me standing before her door. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"We need to talk, Serena." I said simply.  
  
"Look, Setsuna, I'm really sorry about what happened between me and Mamoru I had no idea you two were…" Her voice trailed off, absolutely filled with remorse that despite the innate humor in the situation made me feel guilty rather than induce a smile.  
  
"It's alright Serena," I began slightly uncomfortable with her highly emotional response. I wouldn't begin to know how to comfort anyone so I got to the point. "Mamoru and I aren't a couple."  
  
"You aren't?" She questioned skeptically and with the expected amount of shock. "But you're…"  
  
"Pregnant with his child?" I finished for her. "That's true but we still aren't a couple. We never have been and we never will be."  
  
"Then?" she asked. It was a simple enough question but it demanded a rather lengthy explanation.  
  
"We're friends, same as we've always been although that really doesn't fully define what we've been to each other. I suppose you could say we're really good friends."  
  
"I'll say," she commented, somewhat under her breath in a manner that made me smile.  
  
"Let's just say Mamoru did me a really big favor. I wanted a baby and he gave me one."  
  
"Just like that? He gave you a baby just like that. That is not normal to just get your friend pregnant just because they asked! Just how close are you two?" She was still skeptical.  
  
"Not close enough to be in love, certainly not the way he loves you." She seemed stunned.   
  
"He loves me?" she seemed shocked as she whispered the question. "But he barely knows me!"  
  
"It's enough, Usagi. Mamoru's never been in love before, but I assure you he loves you."  
  
"But what about you?" she asked.  
  
"What about me?"  
  
"Where do you fit into all this? You're having his baby after all."  
  
"I don't fit in at all." I said sadly. "Mamoru needs you Usagi. I don't know how you feel about him but you need to tell him that yourself."  
  
"How can you say that?" she demanded. You're his best friend! You're having his baby for crying out loud! How can you say you don't fit in? You'll always be a part of his life as the mother of his child."  
  
"And you want to know how do you compete with that?" I asked.  
  
"That's not what I meant," she said almost acidly, insulted that I would even suggest it.  
  
"But that is what you want to know isn't it? It's ok to feel that way Usagi. You want to know if you'll always have to compete with me and my child for his attention." Usagi said nothing. I didn't think she'd admit to that.  
  
"I can't make guarantees on the future Usagi. None of us can. I have no intention of intruding on the relationship between you and Mamoru. I know it doesn't sound like much but it's all I can offer you."  
  
"And what if I don't feel the same way about Mamoru that he does about me?" she asked. I actually felt hurt and angry that she would even say that. I hoped it wasn't true. It certainly wasn't something that I had even momentarily considered.   
  
I was angered that she'd even dare reject the feelings he had for her. If she did she definitely didn't deserve him.  
  
"Then I suppose you'll have to tell him," I replied tersely  



	8. epilogue

Chapter 8- Epilogue: Fate, Fortune, and Friendship  
MarshAngel  
watsonma@hotmail.com  
http://www.crosswinds.net/~marshangel/angelmoon.htm  
  
I don't do disclaimers anymore because 1.) I'm broke 2.) No one would dare sue me 3.) That   
would be a waste of energy.  
  
  
According to Setsu, their little talk had gone well but Usagi still hadn't spoken to me. We should have been working together but she was avoiding me. It was disturbing the power she had over me. I had spent more hours within the past few days than I'd care to admit thinking about her, her image haunting my every waking moment and invading my dreams.  
  
I was very tempted to approach her myself but Setsuna said I should wait and give her time to think. I wasn't sure how long that would be, or how long I could wait before I'd slowly go out of my mind however. I am beginning to think that maybe love is too painful to be experienced. I can already feel my heart rending at the idea that she might actually decide not to see me again.  
  
I could almost understand that she could see herself intruding on my relationship with Setsu. In a way she was. I could already feel Setsu withdrawing from me. She saw it as the inevitable change in our relationship, a necessary action so that I could be happy with Serena or whatever other woman would come into my life.  
  
Having another woman in my life at this point however seemed highly unlikely. I could hardly imagine life without her anymore. It seemed, completely and unexpectedly, I had fallen in love with her. And for every day we were apart my heart did not pull away but seemingly sank even deeper into this mire of overwhelming love and despair for its loss, a loss that was hopefully merely temporarily.   
  
While I waited impatiently however, life did not stand still. Quite the opposite seemed to occur actually. Life seemed to push ahead though, mostly without me. I experienced the first of what would most likely be a long series of fatherly moments.  
  
I saw my child's heart beat so fast it was mystifying. It was both exciting and scary, two emotions that seemed to define every moment of this experience thus far. I also saw a half dozen business deals go through and it were as though I had nothing to do with them. I was living outside myself.   
  
It was today, after I had seen my child for the first time in the ultrasound and held Setu's hand as we looked on in amazement that I sat in my offices staring out into the distance over the city. The smooth smoky voice of Ella Fitzgerald sang softly from the stereo on one side of the room, singing, "The Man I Love." It was the middle of the day but the song had me feeling one of those cliché movie moments, one where I sat at a mostly empty bar listening to the beautiful cabaret singer croon along with the piano.  
  
"Nice Song."  
  
I turned at the sound of the voice. I'd been so absorbed with the view and the music I hadn't even heard anyone enter.  
  
She was a sight for sore eyes. In the days I hadn't seen her it seemed she'd only gotten more beautiful. It seemed the light in the room coalesced around her form to turn her into an angel, or rather show her off for the angel I knew her to be. I felt drugged.  
  
"I guess I owe you some congratulations," she said softly. "You're going to be a father."  
  
I smiled as she pulled an arm from behind her back to reveal a fuzzy, flopsy-eared purple rabbit holding a tiny balloon that said congratulations. I got up out of my chair and accepted my gift.  
  
"Thanks. He's cute," I commented, staring at my new stuffed friend.  
  
"He reminded me of you," she said smiling.  
  
I raised an eyebrow. I wondered if that was an insult to my masculinity. I decided not to analyze it further.  
  
"So…" I began.  
  
"So…" she replied, and we both smiled. I guess we were both at a loss for words.  
  
"I missed you," I informed.  
  
She smiled, and blushing as if embarrassed by the knowledge she looked down as she said, "I missed you too." I was happy to hear it.  
  
"Setsuna explained everything," she began. "It's all a little strange but I'm not angry with you. I think I understand and I suppose I just wanted you to know that I'm still here, if you want me still."  
  
I was so happy. I rejoiced by kissing her senseless, making sure to permanently record in my mind the warm, sweet taste of her… just in case.  
  
  
There hadn't been a need to savor that one kiss, Usagi stayed by my side for a long time to come. All the same, for all the kisses and gentle touches I received from her, each one had it's own importance; it's own imprint on my heart. It was the way she touched my son, and held him that I savored the most however, knowing that one day soon that would be our child she held and comforted so tenderly.   
  
There are times when I feel torn between the two women in my life. Each one shares a part of me that the other will never experience and I almost feel guilty for the time I spend with one and not the other. It's a difficult balance but one that must be maintained for I can't say that I could live without either one.   
  
Setsuna had been right. Life had changed. Everything was so different. I couldn't in the slightest bit claim to be lonely anymore. In fact, finding a moment alone to think is an accomplishment these days but I wouldn't give any of it up, it's all too wonderful.  
  
Sometimes I sit and I wonder how it was possible to live before. How did I live without the joy of watching my son sleep, all curled up in a rather adorable soft ball? What wouldn't I have given before just to see Setsu's face glow with joy and light up with laughter when her little boy tried to chew on her hair? And how could I possibly have imagined how beautiful my Usako could be walking down that aisle to meet me?  
  
I can't help but think I don't deserve it all and maybe I really don't. Chances are none of us deserve all the great things that happen to us. It's much easier to be philosophical when you feel you have everything but I think that when you think you have little, or that you've somehow been cheated in life you spend far too much time wallowing in your own self-pity. My life wasn't so bad before, neither was Setsu's; we had each other. But now I have Usa, and it all means so much more.   
  
It's one of these things I learned after I met Usako. I realized that while I'd been through a lot in life it was all-ok. I had survived and done well and most importantly I had her now. All I had to do was appreciate it.  
  
I know it sounds easy to say, especially now that I have so much. Maybe everyone isn't as lucky as I am but still, every little bit should be appreciated, especially your friends.  
  
I don't think I'll ever truly understand, although somewhere inside I think I do, what Setsu has done. I don't think anyone else will ever see what the sacrifice for her was; it is one of those things I truly admire even though I also feel the pain of it too.   
  
We aren't nearly as close as we were, which I suppose is understandable but sometimes it hurts. Sometimes I wish we could be as close as we were but there is a balance in life that must be maintained and you can't have everything you want in life all at once. Setsu and Usako can't share equal portions of my life, Usa is my wife now and she comes first.   
  
There are times I can't help but think that Setsu is one step ahead of me all the time. If not for our son, I doubt we could have maintained as strong a relationship as we have. Her foresight is intimidating sometimes but I always remind myself that without her there would be no Usako in my life and that thought brings a smile to my face and a tear to my eye.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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